Sorry, mom. I’m skipping your turkey dinner for a solo vacation.

Seeking self-care and a respite from the pressures of the season, more Americans are viewing the holidays as a perfect time to take a trip on their own. (Michelle Rohn/The New York Times)

By Julie Weed

Last Thanksgiving, Dennis Friedrichsen, a 43-year-old tech worker from Minnesota, found himself dining on the banks of the Nile, sharing a feast of kebabs and chickpea stew with 11 strangers from three continents. Then he spent Christmas in Tanzania. Like a growing number of travelers, Friedrichsen saw the holidays as the perfect time for a solo adventure.

Spending the holidays away from friends or family has long carried a stigma of loneliness. But that is changing as more people replace the pressures of gift giving and holiday traditions with self-care and the chance to make up for travel opportunities they missed during the COVID pandemic, often making new friends along the way.

Flash Pack, a company that connects almost entirely solo travelers in their 30s and 40s for group adventures, said its bookings had doubled during the holidays in the last two years. Friedrichsen was among those customers.

Other tour organizers and lodging companies are seeing the increased interest, too. The low-cost European lodging chain a&o Hostels has experienced “a massive influx of solo travelers booking during the holidays,” with single-person Christmas reservations soaring 51% from 2019 to 2023, said the company’s CEO, Oliver Winter. “December weekends used to be absolutely offseason and we would think about closing,” he said. “Now it’s a high-occupancy time.”

A mix of factors is fueling the growing popularity of solo trips in general, Winter said. Traveling alone is safer than ever, thanks to online destination and transportation information, widespread cellphone coverage and location-sharing tools, he said. It is also easier than ever to find social activities online, on apps or through a lodging provider — visits to popular Christmas markets and ice skating outings, for example. Winter added that he sees people still making up for the trips they skipped during the COVID years.

The pandemic brought self-care to the fore, with some people now opting to swap pressure-filled family holiday gatherings for a solo escape, said Seattle-based psychotherapist Stephanie Brownell. “Holidays come with expectations,” Brownell said, and people are realizing they have options. “They are feeling more flexible and not bound by preconceived ideas of what a holiday means,” she said, adding that they are “attending to their emotions.”

Social media is contributing to the trend as well, with influencers celebrating solo trips as a mark of independence and adventurousness. Instagram accounts like SarahWoodwardTravels and SunnRayy, each with more than 100,000 followers, offer inspiration and encouragement to those thinking of traveling alone, with photo posts that have captions like “You’ve never been married but have taken yourself on more honeymoons than you can count.” Taking a trip on your own now, Brownell said, “offers a sense of agency as an alternative to tradition.”

For some, going solo over the holidays can end up being a gift to their family, Brownell said. An older parent taking a solo trip, for example, could reduce the pressure on grown children, who may be establishing their own traditions, planning their own vacations or spending time with in-laws. Telling them, “‘Go have fun. I’m going to have a great time, too,’ takes a big weight off the kids,” Brownell said. “You are modeling self-care and letting your children know they don’t have to worry about you.”

Big cities are popular with independent travelers. Tokyo, London, New York and Las Vegas are among the top destinations for solo travelers this holiday season, according data from Expedia. But of course, trips are as varied as the travelers. Specialists putting together itineraries in Africa, Indian Ocean islands and remote Asian locales have also seen a notable increase in people traveling alone.

Some solo travelers see the end of the year as a time to rest, renew and restart. Lenner Garrido, general manager at the Punta Islita, a Marriott Autograph Collection hotel on Costa Rica’s Nicoya Peninsula, attributes a 20% jump in solo travel bookings from the previous year to guests seeking “rejuvenation in a peaceful environment surrounded by nature.”

Friedrichsen said a variety of reasons spurred his decision to go it alone, twice, during the holidays last year. His sister had recently started her own family, and his parents were reveling in celebrating Christmas as first-time grandparents, so he was giving them some space. “I don’t live too far away, so I could see them a different week,” he said. Also, traveling over the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays allowed him to take a longer trip while using fewer vacation days, something he said he valued more than material gifts. And the clincher: With his own birthday near Christmas, he wanted to celebrate by “doing amazing things in other parts of the world.”

Amber Laree, 58, a New York-based travel planner at Mountain Travel Sobek, a company that puts together outdoor and cultural journeys, found herself drawn to solo trips when her children grew up and she divorced her husband. “I spent most of my adult life curating magical experiences for others at the holidays,” she said. “For decades, I put great effort into ensuring the surprise and delight of my family.” Now, she said, she travels over the holidays as a present to herself, this year planning to go to Thailand, Cambodia, Laos and Vietnam in November and December.

“No turkeys to roast, no decorations to put up and take down, no endless gift shopping,” Laree said.

There was an escapist element to her travel plans as well, Laree said. “Loneliness and loss can be overwhelming at the holidays,” and it can be a relief, she said, to be “in the company of strangers who have no knowledge of, or investment in, my past.”